"No Angry"

So I had my first adventure with acupuncture this afternoon... have you ever tried it? Please post a comment with your experience if you have.

I've always been intrigued by Chinese medicine. Those folks in the east sure seem to work on a higher level than us yokels in the west. When we moved to our new abode in Brooklyn, one of the things in the neighborhood that immediately caught my eye was the Qi Gong storefront around the corner. Massage and acupuncture, two things that I keep reading about as good treatments for many of the ailments I harbor in this (not so) wee bod. Lately I keep running across reports of studies that show acupuncture as a promising "new" (haha) treatment for things like infertility and fibromyalgia. About six weeks ago, Dave had a bum shoulder and went to this place for a massage. He had a nearly religious experience. So, I figure, what the hell... I've been stuck with enough needles in my life to not be afraid of a few more... why not give it a try?

The place is your typical small storefront. There's a reception area in the front and in the back they have makeshift bamboo covered walls separating the four stalls. There's some faux painting on the walls and new age music to set the serene tone. There are a handful of staff members, all Chinese and none who speak English all that well, so communication is awkward at best. But I get the message across that I want to find out about acupuncture, so the woman shuffles through a desk drawer to find a paper for me to fill out. I put down all the ailments of concern, placing "infertility" at the top of the list. When the woman returns, she says that the doctor has gone to Chinatown on an errand and won't be back for a half hour... would I like to come back or have a massage?

Needless to say, I had the massage. It was excellent, of course, but nothing very interesting or different to report, other than the fact that two women performed the service, each alternating to answer the phone or whatever and then coming back, murmuring a few words in Chinese to each other, but never missing a stroke.

Shortly after the massage is done, the doctor arrives and sits me down at the desk in the reception area to do a consultation. It's a bit odd, discussing my health concerns there in front of everyone, but hey... I'm Full Frontal Honesty... I don't give a rat's ass if the kid waiting for a rub down learns the timing and consistency of my menstrual cycles. While the doctor is full of good humor, he not very adept at speaking English. Still, we manage. I was a wee bit fearful when he had to look up "infertility" in the English/Chinese dictionary. But he assured me that although his English skills were poor, he was a very good doctor. He said he mixes east and west medicine and therefore he "knows everything." I say "that's why I'm here... because you know everything." We are sharing awkward humor across the language barrier. A good sign.

He takes my pulse and blood pressure, asking me questions the entire time. How long you married? When your last period? Blah, blah, blah... and then he says something about "inflamation" and "TB" and what I gather to mean that other things can cause infertility, other than those my western doctor has talked about. He looks at me earnestly and says something about me being sad, stressed and angry and how that is a problem. He says these things pointing to his heart and I nearly start to cry, although I can't really explain why.

Finally, he took me into one of the makeshift stalls in the back for an examination. It was pretty much the same as a western doctor's exam, although he did a few things that were a bit different. When pressing on my lower back, I had pain and he said he had no evidence, but that he suspected a disk problem and that I should go have an MRI to get a diagnosis. But, other than that, he said the exam was normal and he proceeded with the acupuncture.

He put four or five needles in, circling my belly button, and I didn't feel a thing. Then he put one in each ankle. I felt the prick of each one, and a tiny bit of stinging in my left ankle, but nothing too bad. Then he attached wires to two of the needles in my belly and hooked them up to a tiny machine with a bunch of black dials. This sent an electric pulse into the needles, and he asked me if it was "light or heavy" and I said "medium", so he left it at that level. Then he pointed an infrared lamp over my belly. "Too hot?" "No." And that was that, for about a half hour. He came in and out of the room, asking questions, explaining things. He talked about chi and the balance of yin and yang in Chinese medicine. He talked about coming from Shanghai and moving from Connecticut to NYC. I told him about moving from Chicago to NYC.

He said that the acupuncture and herbs were important, but that the spirit is important, too. "No angry." he said again and again. And each time he did, I couldn't help but laugh. It just summed things up so readily for me. "No angry" is the bottom line. It's probably the key to every illness I've encountered. I kept saying "that's the hard part" and he would say, "you can do it." Then he said he would give me a Chinese tea to drink and that I should come back for another session in a week. So we'll see what happens.

In the meantime, I'm going to put alot more energy into finding ways to eliminate the "angry" from my system.